That's Ms. to you
Let me share with you one of the things that irks the living shit out of me: being addressed as Mrs. Joshua S.
My sister-in-law is getting ready to send her wedding invitations out and I told her if mine comes addressed to Mr. and Mrs. Joshua S then I am not coming to the wedding. Nevermind the fact that I am IN the wedding, small detail.
I know it's proper etiquette and all that blah blah crap, but for me, it boils down to the fact that it's as if I ceased to exist as my own person with my own name when I got married.
This is the exact reason I should have kept my name. No one could have formally addressed me as Mrs. Joshua anything because I would have stayed Ms. Amy S. Period. End of envelope.
Does anyone else out there get as annoyed by this as me? Or am I just weird?
My sister-in-law is getting ready to send her wedding invitations out and I told her if mine comes addressed to Mr. and Mrs. Joshua S then I am not coming to the wedding. Nevermind the fact that I am IN the wedding, small detail.
I know it's proper etiquette and all that blah blah crap, but for me, it boils down to the fact that it's as if I ceased to exist as my own person with my own name when I got married.
This is the exact reason I should have kept my name. No one could have formally addressed me as Mrs. Joshua anything because I would have stayed Ms. Amy S. Period. End of envelope.
Does anyone else out there get as annoyed by this as me? Or am I just weird?
Labels: It's all about me
posted by Amy at
8:57 PM
15 Comments:
When people call me Mrs W, I still look around for my mil! She is of the school that she is Mrs Ray W. Not me! To quote the great Johnny Cash, "My name is Sue. How do you do?!"
Doesn't bother me at all. In fact, I kinda like being called Mrs. S.
However I can totally appreciate that it bothers you!
I like my married name, I was happy to get rid of my maiden name. So I guess you didn't practice writing your married name when you were engaged?
My aunt was insulted if her mail was NOT adressed to Mrs. Angus M. even after he was dead.
http://unmitigated.typepad.com
I was also happy to get rid of my maiden name because my intials were BBQ. Now they are BBR so no more barbeque jokes can be made. I've only been married a year so I'm still not totally used to my married name. It still takes me a minute to figure out who people are talking to when they say "Mrs. R." But I can totally understand where you are coming from too.
This post has been removed by the author.
I kept my maiden name, and so did my sister. In fact, my sister's husband changed HIS last name to hers. I get to ignore people when they address me with the wrong name, and Sis gets to smack around anyone who calls her husband "whipped" for changing his name. Works for us.
When I got married, I struggled with what to do about my name for a very long time. I settled on FirstName MaidenName MarriedName.
The Christmas after I got married, my mother... MY OWN MOTHER sent a card to my home to Mr. and Mrs. TheHubby's Full Name.
Having faced the prospect of being clubbed with her own Christmas Tree, she has not done it since.
WELL, I can tell you that I regret changing my name (almost) every day. I went from a name that was not all that common, but easy to say and easy to spell and went nicely with my first name. Now I have a last name that no one has ever heard of, no one can spell, and still (5 years later) feels like a stranger's name every time I hear it. Yeah, soooo wishing I hadn't changed the name.
HAHAHAHA! Wait for your thank you card!
I don't really care either way. I go by my maiden name at work, but my old boss used to introduce me by my married name, and so of course everyone was always like "oh! you got married since I last saw you!" and I'm always like "uh. no. I've been married the whole time you've known me."
but at my SIL's wedding, I was Mrs. MaidenName. This is because my SIL didn't understand the difference between Mrs and Ms.
I get confused when referred to by Husband's last name b/c I never got around to changing mine, so I am still Sarah S. instead of Sarah C.
I loved it when Ethan was born and everyone in the hospital referred to Husband as Mr S instead of Mr C.
I'm with you, don't call me Mrs. Jon L. Unless you're 80+, then you get a pass.
Makes me appreciate those who address formal invitations to H and J L. And I always write both of our names on the reply card.
I think skipping a wedding is probably a bit much, but I totally understand what you mean. I'd be a little more forgiving of older people, because this is such an ingrained habit, but it does strike me as especially odd that when my wife's grandparents send her something in the mail, it comes addressed to Mrs. Daniel ____.
I can't imagine doing that or thinking that way, but I can imagine being unable to break habits beaten into you by nuns over the course of a formative decade.
At least the times seem to be a-changin', right?
Such an interesting subject for discussion...for me, I am who I am no matter what I'm called (think that mindset goes back to the "sticks and stones" education of my youth!)--being the "Mrs." was a decision I made as me, merely an additional title added to my resume of self-defining characteristics...being called "Darren and Sarah's Mom" is not bothersome or indicative of a "loss of identity" in my eyes either...it's all additive, not subtractive. (to me, but I respect "peeves" like noboby's business!)
Post a Comment
Links to this post:
Create a Link
<< Home