Going Krazee
I should not be left home alone when there are home improvement projects to be done. Case in point, I superglued my entire left hand to itself this afternoon.
Because I was still on one-child duty today, I figured I would get some more things done around the house. Thanks to the four shots Emmie received yesterday, she slept most of the day. When I say most of the day, I mean she took a four-hour nap and then was up for 30 minutes and then took a three-hour nap. Brilliant!
During the first nap, I was up and down the stairs a million times and kept trying to make sure the gate didn't slam behind me. A few months ago, Josh had put a little piece of felt on the inside of the gate so it wouldn't make noise when we inevitably let it slam behind us 1,500 times a day. It fell off, oh, forever ago, and today I remembered where it was and decided to get the Krazee glue out.
The Krazee glue, in our house, is kept on the windowsill in the kitchen. Doesn't everyone keep it there? So I grabbed it and stopped at the top of the stairs to put a little glue on the teeny-tiny piece if felt. Except it wouldn't come out. It wasn't clogged, I could see the glue, so I just pushed a little harder.
There was a brief moment when the glue EXPLODED onto the felt and all over my hand when I almost laughed. But then I realized OHMYGODMYFINGERSAREBONDEDTOGETHER. I was right next to the bathroom, so I ran to the sink and managed to stop hyperventilating and calmed down enough in that two seconds to remember that nail polish remover unbonds skin stuck together with superglue! All that random knowledge stored in my head finally went to some good use.
But I don't wear nail polish. So why would I have nail polish remover? But thank you baby jesus, Josh's mom does wear nail polish and she bought a bottle of nail polish remover once and kept it at our house and because I have a photographic memory of the contents of every single thing in this house in my head, I reached for the far cabinet on the right. Bingo.
Of course there was glue on my right hand by now as well, not just as much, and thankfully my fingers did not stick to the cabinet pull. I frantically unscrewed the top and literally poured half the bottle on my left hand.
That did indeed unstick my fingers from one another, but instantly rendered all that glue dry on my hand. So now instead of them being stuck together, they were covered in dry white glue. Which I spent the next hour soaking and scraping from my poor chapped little fingers.
The nail on my ring finger is still coated in dried glue, but I have managed to remove the offending substance from the pads of all the affected fingers. I am quite sure I removed the pattern of my fingerprints with it, so if you hear anything about a bank robbery involving a lack of prints, it wasn't me.
Because I was still on one-child duty today, I figured I would get some more things done around the house. Thanks to the four shots Emmie received yesterday, she slept most of the day. When I say most of the day, I mean she took a four-hour nap and then was up for 30 minutes and then took a three-hour nap. Brilliant!
During the first nap, I was up and down the stairs a million times and kept trying to make sure the gate didn't slam behind me. A few months ago, Josh had put a little piece of felt on the inside of the gate so it wouldn't make noise when we inevitably let it slam behind us 1,500 times a day. It fell off, oh, forever ago, and today I remembered where it was and decided to get the Krazee glue out.
The Krazee glue, in our house, is kept on the windowsill in the kitchen. Doesn't everyone keep it there? So I grabbed it and stopped at the top of the stairs to put a little glue on the teeny-tiny piece if felt. Except it wouldn't come out. It wasn't clogged, I could see the glue, so I just pushed a little harder.
There was a brief moment when the glue EXPLODED onto the felt and all over my hand when I almost laughed. But then I realized OHMYGODMYFINGERSAREBONDEDTOGETHER. I was right next to the bathroom, so I ran to the sink and managed to stop hyperventilating and calmed down enough in that two seconds to remember that nail polish remover unbonds skin stuck together with superglue! All that random knowledge stored in my head finally went to some good use.
But I don't wear nail polish. So why would I have nail polish remover? But thank you baby jesus, Josh's mom does wear nail polish and she bought a bottle of nail polish remover once and kept it at our house and because I have a photographic memory of the contents of every single thing in this house in my head, I reached for the far cabinet on the right. Bingo.
Of course there was glue on my right hand by now as well, not just as much, and thankfully my fingers did not stick to the cabinet pull. I frantically unscrewed the top and literally poured half the bottle on my left hand.
That did indeed unstick my fingers from one another, but instantly rendered all that glue dry on my hand. So now instead of them being stuck together, they were covered in dry white glue. Which I spent the next hour soaking and scraping from my poor chapped little fingers.
The nail on my ring finger is still coated in dried glue, but I have managed to remove the offending substance from the pads of all the affected fingers. I am quite sure I removed the pattern of my fingerprints with it, so if you hear anything about a bank robbery involving a lack of prints, it wasn't me.
Labels: It's all about me
posted by Amy at
9:16 PM
2 Comments:
Man, that sounds like something out of a sitcom.
The adventures of your life... you should write a book. I would buy it. Just love your sense of humor!
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